WHO I AM/ I FEEL TO BE

I give a short overview who I am, what has been my main landmarks in my life so far and how my daily life works.

I am Hille, a 22-year-old Estonian girl. I love travelling, meeting new people, learning about new cultures and countries. I love what life has to offer me – it is in my own hands to pick it up and implement in my schedule. I would travel and move around borders more if I were not a student. However, one of the reasons of studying International Relations was to acquire budget of knowledge and to use it in my future life while travelling from one country to another. I dreamt of becoming a diplomat or a delegate and this dream has not left me so far. 

I feel international. Even my family is international. My mother lives in the northern Iceland, my older sister has lived in Texas, the U.S., in Iceland and travelled a lot. My younger sister has lived in Austria and my father he has travelled a lot, making several journeys every year. And me? 

By this day, I have lived a year in Antwerp, Belgium and six months in Budapest, Hungary.  Both of these periods have added so much to my experience box and been supportive of my development process. I was still 17 when moved to Belgium to study free arts in one of the best art high schools in Belgium. I was ready to leave my comfort zone and become independent, able to make my own decision and take steps towards my dreamt profession as a fashion designer. But it was then... . In Belgium I was supported by my host family, who eventually became my second family (and they are in that position even today). Now I have a place to go every year on my holiday, marking this present year down as the 7^th time back at my Belgian home. Every time I experience more, learn something about myself and I am more and more convinced about the fact that I love travelling, the time at the destinations, and even the hours I spend on the route or at the airports.

                Language has always been important for me. I have learned six languages besides my mother tongue Estonian – English, Russian, Dutch, French, Hungarian and Italian. From this list, I speak fluent English and Dutch, understand a lot from French texts when reading, but it is not good enough to speak freely. The Russian language was once quite decent, but due to lack of practice, I have forgotten the majority of this. The Hungarian language was a decision just to cope with my life in Budapest. I did not plan to develop it on a higher level, however, I was able to ask and express my simpler wills. It was so satisfying. Italian, likewise French, have been in my deeper interest for a longer time and since these are a bit similar- based on the Latin structure, it is easier to learn them together. Moreover, it would help me in my following Erasmus semester in Rome.

                Another reason of being an international cell of the universe is that I settle down easily, make contacts fast, and that has created me an oportunity to move around Europe and a lot of places in the world, where I have at least one person who I could contact and ask questions from a local - hence, also the best and the most direct source. Quite often I do not even need to look for an accommodation or activities to do, since I know people who can either host me or invest some time in introducing their culture or surroundings. Such thing makes the world smaller and smaller.

                I am young restless soul, searching for my place in this world. Learning new knowledge, discovering places, meeting new people is something I attribute a lot of value in my life at the moment. I feel international, I feel at home wherever I go. That makes it more difficult to stay in one place, to settle down in Estonia where my soul wants to absorb more and more. I am happy who I am, I love myself as I am and hence, try to fit in the picture and find my track and seat in this world. 

A photo of my Erasmus friends from Budapest. Now, one year ago, I still keep in touch with them and value these contact very highly, even when making new contacts and friends. These people were my family in Budapest, they managed to make a space in my heart 

A photo from the time I lived in Belgium and was still doing arts. My host brother asked for a painting on his wall, preferably a copy of a famous painting (such as 'The last evening meal' or 'Napoleon crossing the Alps', but instead of the Jesus or the Napoleon, he asked me to paint his face.) The size of it is 1m x 1m20. 

I love taking risks, therefore I decided to take my courage and jump off the airplaine with the parachute Although, it is possible to parachute jump also as a tandem, I decided to do it myself, the first time, alone from the 800m height. The wind was a bit too strong for my weight, carrying me away from the landing area. I survived, did not get any injuries, despite the fact that I landed in the middle of the forest. Usually I am not too much afraid of connsequences, but this time it was frightening to see only sharp tips of spruces below me at the height (300m) where I was supposed to prepare myself for landing. I had luck and I landed on a forestry way, all safe and without damaging the equipment. Even though it was not my best outcome, I promised myself to try once again, because the feeling of ultimate freedom was simply amazing 

As being part of the NGO organisation 'Loomade Nimel' (For the Animals), I have participated at the protest action 2016 fall period. Since animal rights, economic sustainability, Human rights etc. are part of my life philosophy, I am not afraid to stand out and speak up for my beliefs, despite the anger or disapproval from the society. I am proud to be part of this group and part of the working team of the vegan restaurant where I work at. These people are not just my colleagues or partners, they are my second Estonian family, a group of people, who are something more than just friends. 

I am not afraid to speak up for demonstrations, to strike or revolt against the laws, the government or inequality. I want to live in the better world, and not just a world where is peace in terms of wars and massacre, but also that animals are safe, not used as material or things. Noone in this world was born here to get slaughtered, incarcerated or tortured. I stand for the better world. 

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